I Will Never Be a Size 2

Recently I’ve been seeing a lot going around about the “Fat Acceptance Movement”. I, however, chose to ignore it. Why? Because I’m not sure I’ll agree with it. Or maybe I would, I don’t know. But here’s what I do know.

I am not fat, but I have never seen myself as skinny. I look back at pictures from high school, the peak of female insecurities and pressures to be thin, and I wonder why the hell I was ever unsatisfied with my body. I played 2 sports and ate fairly well. My collarbones protruded but my belly always had a pooch and my inner thighs touched, at least that’s what I thought. I was pretty thin, but still always wanted to be thinner. How sad is that? Why do girls continuously feel the need to be smaller?

I will never be a size 2. I am 5’9, if I were a size 2 I would look sick. I am at a comfortable size 6 and if a shirt covers my butt in leggings then I will buy it even if it is an extra-large. I could spend an hour looking in the mirror picking out imperfections while poking all the dimples in my butt and wishing my arms were smaller and yeah I would fit right in with The Plastics but I know I'm not the only one who does this.

Here’s the thing that bothers me. If I voice my insecurities with someone who doesn’t think I should have them, I get told to shut up. Should I feel bad about being insecure? The worst thing about this is I am often on the shutting up side of that conversation.

One friend of mine, specifically, is very skinny. She does not see herself this way. I’ll get mad if she complains about her body, that she had thigh dimples or that her legs touch because dammit you’re skinnier than I am so just shut up already. How hypocritical of me.

She is insecure. I am insecure. We all have insecurities whether they’re about our bodies or something else, and no one’s insecurities are any less serious or important than yours are.

Most of my friends are of average size. I don’t know how they see themselves, but from the outside they seem accepting of who they are and what they’re bodies look like.

I’d put money down and bet that they are unhappy.

Another friend of mine, beautifully curvy, is the most confident girl I know. She has said before “if you don’t like my body in a bathing suit then don’t look at it”. Preach, girl.

I think we all need to stop complaining about what we do or do not look like and just be accepting of ourselves and of other people. I don’t know much about the “Fat Acceptance Movement”, but I hope that it can just become the “Acceptance Movement”. If you don't like your body then do something to chance it. In the mean time, learn to accept yourself, accept other people, and screw everyone that has something to say about it.

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